Analysis of Mexican Men

After talking about Korean men, let’s be fair and destroy talk about Mexican men mwahahahaha. Don’t worry I’ll be nice… Actually this is very difficult. What can I say about Mexican men? What is my viewpoint about Mexican men as a Mexican girl?

Usually people say “What do you know about love if you haven’t kissed a Mexican?” I’ve never kissed a Mexican😄

So don’t ask me if Mexicans are good kissers.

Seriously, I have never had a Mexican boyfriend. I’ve never had a date with a Mexican. So I will just say what girls have told me, but none of those are personal experiences.  You know that I only have male friends, so most of the information I have comes from them. This may be more from the viewpoint of men that women in general.

First I want to explain something. Usually people think that I am racist because I have only had foreign boyfriends while I don’t date Mexicans, but I didn’t say “I will never date a Mexican”.

So I am not racist, is just that I am always in the middle of weird situations that don’t let me to have a common relationship with a common Mexican guy like every girl does. I neither say “I want to date Mexican guys” or “I don’t want to date Mexican guys”. Actually I don’t know what will happen in the future because… what would be life after Ryeowook? I am ruined for other men D=

Dating foreigners may be hard due to the cultural differences, but at the same time if both consider the extra effort to communicate, to understand the cultural differences, the fact that they are not being racist to each other… it helps to be more understanding if there is a conflict. Plus the fact that is more interesting to discover a whole new world. But if you are dating someone from your same country things are different, because each one can be more demanding. You know exactly if they are racist, sexist, classist, the lies they usually say, the tricks they use and is easier to know if they are giving as much as they are asking for.

Actually I don’t date Mexicans because I don’t like to date guys at the job or school… can you image that? You break up with the guy and you still have to work with him every day and watch him having a new girlfriend. No, no, no…

And I don’t go to parties or clubs, where would I find a Mexican guy to date? It’s nothing personal…

But I have seen couples around me and I want to share with you all the information I have, hoping it may be useful.

NOTE: Most of the characteristics may fit to every guy in the world and not only Mexican guys.

Let’s start talking about the beauty standards for Mexican men… and I had to make a very serious research about it. So I was looking for the Top10 of the most handsome men in Mexico and I found this link: “Top10 of the most desired Mexican single men”

http://www.mundo.com/entretenimiento/los-10-solteros-mas-guapos-y-codiciados-de-mexico/

Most of these men are actors in dramas, and we already know that women fall in love with actors in dramas thinking that they are as a nice as their role. All those men have the same style. Talking about stereotypes in a very general way… Mexican women who watch dramas love this type of men. Who watches these dramas? I would say women over 30 years old, mothers with husbands who work and they are just housewives. Usually they are more traditionalist than women who are divorced or workers. Every year less young women watch dramas because they are aware that dramas show an unreal world.

In my very own opinion, I don’t like the men on the list, not even a little bit. I don’t watch dramas because I feel they promote sexism. Therefore men chosen for dramas have to be very manly men, mature, tall, with wide shoulders, strong arms, strong legs, strong body, strong voice… to emphasize the roles of the manly man and the very feminine women.

The trend now is men with dirty beards… and I hate beards… seriously. There are just a few things in the world that I can hate as much as I hate beards. Now is a trend and every guy has a beard.

In my opinion there are not as handsome men on television as there must be, because most actors are from rich, powerful families. It means that sometimes you may find more handsome men in everyday life than on television, but they won’t become famous if they are not from a powerful family. While is the very opposite situation for women. A woman can do everything if she is pretty and dates a rich, powerful man.

Let’s talk about young, single average Mexican women. For Mexican women the personality is very important, so an ugly man with a very good personality may be sexier than a handsome man with a bad personality. It is very common to see really cute girls dating really ugly boys. The secret is how they treat girls.

Years ago mothers used to tell their daughters: “Look for a man with the 3F’s Feo, Fornido, Formal (Ugly, hefty, formal)”. They had the idea that if a man is ugly they have no other option than to be nice. The man had to be hefty and big to do the hard work at home… and formal, it means polite. While very handsome men tend to be cheaters or players, because they seduce girls everywhere they go.

Younger girls don’t think that. Because sometimes handsome men don’t need to show off about their seductive abilities, they know they are handsome and they can get a girl easily, so no need to brag about it seducing several girls. At the same time they are worried about finding a girl who loves them and not a girl who just want them as a trophy like “Oh I have the boyfriend that every girl wants”.

While ugly men can have inferiority complex and do everything to prove people that they can date cute girls. That kind of guy can spend a long time without a girl, suddenly he has a cute girlfriend and he feels crazy about his new power and tries to seduce more and more girls, becomes a player and loses his girlfriend.

That’s why women prefer a guy with a nice personality. It includes a good self-confidence, so he won’t be a cheater and at the same time he will be less jealous with his girlfriend. A guy who is funny or laughs a lot is better because it means how he will react while facing troubles…. Will he laugh or get angry? If he gets angry easily he would be a violent man, and nobody wants that.

There is a huge difference between guys according to their age. Older men will be more sexist and younger men will be more open-minded. Also, there is a great difference between a boyfriend and a husband.

What kind of girls do Mexican men like?

Mexican men live in an eternal fight for the title of “Alpha Male”. They want to be the best “hunters” and feel proud of their prey. So they don’t like shy, innocent girls, because they see these girls as “easy to fool”. If a guy says “I got that girl” his friend will say: “She is so innocent, anyone would impress her. But do you see that fierce, unmanageable tigress? I got her. Nobody else could have her, but I did it. They tried to get her using any kind of strategies, but I was the only one to get her.” And the friend will say: “Well, let’s see for how long you can keep her haha“. Seriously I saw that conversation a thousand times between male friends.

Mexican men love foreign girls. It doesn’t matter where they come from. It is very important for them to give a good impression with foreign girls because they want to keep that image of “Mexican men are very romantic”. They think that if a Mexican guy is mean to a foreigner she would go back to her country and say bad things about them and Mexican men will create a bad image in the world. They say “A single jerk may ruin the image for a whole country”.

And they want to have experiences that other men don’t.

Now there is a very weird “fact” about men. A friend told me this so I don’t know if most men think like that or just him. Once he told me that he didn’t like skinny girls because he was very hefty and likes to give bear hugs and squeeze the girl in his arms… but he had a very skinny girlfriend and when he hugged her, he felt she would break down like if she were made of crystal.

When men want a girl to fall in love they will do ANYTHING for her. There are kinds of guys so I will talk about the kind of guys that I know… the average Mexican man or the most common kind.

But there are also some kinds of men that you should be aware of. Mexican guys are famous for the serenades and I know it would be very romantic for foreign girls but local girls don’t fall for it. A serenade is very expensive and they do it just on very special occasions like birthdays or mom’s day. BUT there is a special kind of men who are “romantic and bohemian” who gives serenades…. Usually they are alcoholic guys who cheat on their girlfriends and they use serenades to ask for forgiveness and get the girl back. Don’t fall for that fake romanticism.

An average Mexican guy will spend most of his money buying things for his girlfriend, or paying for the activities they do together. A Mexican guy will never, never, never let the girl to pay. A girl paying for the dinner hurts his manhood.

I don’t see Mexican guys as very “romantic”, I’ve seen more romantic actions on foreigners. Mexican guys do small things all the time that are nice and guys from other countries don’t usually do. Those things are little actions that guys do as part of being a gentleman and they always do it, doesn’t matter if the girl is there or not. This is what Mexican girls usually miss when they date foreign boys.

A Mexican guy will always be focused on the fact his girlfriend is the most important in his life. She is his queen and he will treat her as a queen. Once he falls in love there is nothing more important than her.

I will describe a common date:

He goes to the girl’s house to pick her up. Girl won’t be ready (as usual).  He will wait for her in the living room with her family or outside of the house if the girl is alone. If the guy has to wait for an hour just standing outside of her house, he will do it without saying a word. If you see Mexican men in the game that just come do a couple of instances and leave 40 minutes later.. It is sure that they were waiting for a girlfriend.

Now, if you are a girl, and your boyfriend arrives 15minutes late for a date, you leave and never talk to him again. If you are a guy and the girl is late for an hour, you wait, just wait and don’t dare to complain!

If the guy comes into the house he will be talking to his girlfriend’s mom like if he was his son. The mother will force him to eat something even if the date is in a restaurant.

Usually Mexican guys meet the parents when they are still friends with the girl, so the parents know exactly how the relationship goes from friendship, to engagement. Family sees the process little by little. In some other countries, the girl introduces his boyfriend to her parents, when they are about to get married. In Mexico meeting the parents doesn’t mean a serious relationship.

An honorable man should go to the girl’s house and tell the parents that they will go out for a date and what time they will be back. Then parents know that he is a responsible man who will take care of her properly. If the guy doesn’t want to do that is because he knows that parents won’t feel comfortable with him. It happens just when guys look really bad, like a guy full of piercings and tattoos. A common guy shouldn’t have any problem.

The couple will go out and walk a little bit over the city or they will go to a park to “talk” (Actually kissing nonstop). The guy will tell her how pretty she is again and again and she will laugh at everything he says. They will be holding hands all the time. There is nothing that can separate them. A couple that don’t hold hands all the time is not a real couple.

If they are walking on the street the girl always goes on the side of the houses and the guy goes on the side of the cars, “for the girl’s safety”. It means that if there is a car crash, the car will hit the boy and not the girl. That’s what a gentleman does… Dying for his lady! Hahaha.

My dad even had some weird theories about which spot on a car may have more possibilities of being hit in an accident.

If people are walking on the same sidewalk or there is an obstacle, and they can’t go together, the guy will walk behind her or even between the cars. They will be walking around the city and the guy will buy whatever the girl wants, like ice cream, cotton candy or little gifts. He will even buy things that she doesn’t want.

If they are in the subway or bus, the girl will always go in the window’s side, because if the bus gets full and there is an elder or a pregnant woman the guy will give his spot.

The girl always enters places first, he opens the doors for her, she sits down at the table first. This is basic education for men. If your guy doesn’t do that, punch him in the face!

My male friends always complain about the same things women do at dates. At the dinner there is something that men really hate: A girl who says “Oh, I am not eating anything. I am on a diet but if you beg enough I will have salad. Wait the salad looks… ewwww. I won’t eat it.” Girls, don’t do that, if you are not eating then don’t have a date on a restaurant.

Or sometimes girls wear high heels, and after 5 minutes they are complaining about being tired… or they are talking on the phone with their friends all the time and don’t even hear what he is saying… seriously, I can’t stand women. Mexican men are very nice but at the first tantrum the girl does, they will get mad and never talk to you again.

Men talk a lot during the date. They will want to look cool and will tell you all their exaggerated stories about heroism. Don’t be afraid if they tell you crazy stories like “Once I found a robber with an elder woman, and he had a gun. I fooled him, I could hit him and threw the gun away, then another man appeared and tried to hit me, but I hit him first. When they both were lying on the floor, another 15 armed men came by and I could beat all of them with bare hands, because I could get very violent and dangerous. I can get blind of rage.” It is not true, they are not that violent. They are just trying to look cool.

After the date, he will take you home. He will tell your father “Mister, here is your daughter. We came back at the promised hour. She is safe. I took care of her properly. Thank you for trusting me”. If the guy doesn’t take you home, he is a jerk. Punch him in the face! A Mexican father would never let him to date his daughter again.

Once the guy arrives home, he will call his girlfriend to tell her that he is fine and say good night. If you don’t wait for him to call you and go to sleep before that, you failed as girlfriend. How can you sleep if you don’t know if he arrived safe to his home?

A Mexican guy will spend hours with his girlfriend. There are common jokes about “When the man is your boyfriend, magically they always have time and money”. Doesn’t matter how poor or busy the guy is, they will always have unlimited time and money.

Usually couples talk for hours on the phone, even if they just arrived from a date or spent the whole day together. They talk every single day. Couples spend time together, as much as possible, because Mexican men think that if they neglect their girlfriend, if they don’t pay enough attention to her, another guy will do it and will “steal” her. The strategy: They try to get as much time as they can, so you don’t have time left to talk to other men and fall in love with someone else. They will ask for more and more and more time.

And this is very serious. If you have a boyfriend and break up with him in the morning… in the afternoon will be another guy ready to make you his girlfriend.

Usually when you have a boyfriend, you don’t have any other kind of social life. Forget about friends, hobbies or time for yourself. And here is a very tiny line between a boyfriend who loves you so much that he can’t live without you, and a stalker who will become like your shadow and won’t let you alone until you feel suffocated.

Young men are not violent as they were on the past, but now they have new ways of psychological violence. Remember that isolation is one of them, so be careful with that kind of guys.

This attitude very nice when you start a relationship, when you are in the “honey moon”, but it is very sad when you break up because you suddenly realize that you have no life without him, you have no friends left and you are completely lost and alone in the middle of the crowd… and you may want to go back in the relationship even if he did something really bad.

There is a kind of boy called “the bubble gum man”. He will stick to you like bubble gum to your hair. He will call you all the time, in the middle of the class, in the middle of the job. Even if you tell him that your boss will fire you if you answer the phone, they will still do it. They will even call you at the office’s phone instead of your cellphone.

They won’t tell you “You can’t go out with your friends” but they will call you every 5 minutes, until they are sure that you came back home, then they will spent the rest of the day with emotional blackmail until you prefer not to go out with friends anymore. If you find one of those, run, run while you can. People usually tell women: If you break up, you cry 3 days and the next day you go on with your life…. unless you are dating a bubble-gum guy. If you let the relationship to go on you will feel tired soon or later… and after you will try to break up with them and they will almost commit suicide. The drama after the relationship can even last longer that the relationship itself.

For men is different. The girl loses her friends, but he doesn’t. It is the very opposite. What would make a Mexican man the happiest men in the world? When you say nice things about his friends. For them is like you “approve” his friends, so in case you get married, you will still let him to go out with friends and it won’t cause fights between the couple. Sometimes they take you with them to their activities. Let’s say that a guy plays soccer as hobby. He will take you with him to play and you will sit with the other girlfriends while watching them like cheerleaders. If the other guys don’t have a girlfriend, his friends will do a whole performance to make your boyfriend look as the hero of the night. That’s what men do to support his friend.

So if you become his friend’s friend, your boyfriend will be very happy. It means that you want to get into his world, that you accept and approve his friends, that you think that he makes good choices, and you are willing to learn about everything that is important for him.

If you don’t make a relationship with your boyfriend’s friends, they will think that you don’t like them, that you are arrogant and will hate you. They will tell bad things to your boyfriend. They won’t stop until you 2 break up.

Now, the boyfriend shouldn’t get close to the girl’s female friends, because he would look as a player, it would be disrespectful. And if the guy is nice, you don’t want your female friends close to him, they will do everything to steal your boyfriend. Even if she has been your best friend your whole life.  That’s why I can’t stand women.

When relationships end, men will have the desire for revenge. So they may say or do things as revenge, like telling you: “I am glad we broke up, because I didn’t tell you but, actually I have had a girlfriend for years and I cheated on her with you”. This is not true, they are just burnt.

After the breaking up, Mexican men may say that you were mean, that you weren’t as nice as they expected, or give any other excuse, but they will never ever call you a “whore” or “slut”. A Mexican gentleman will be respectful to the woman even years after breaking up (unless he is a real jerk).

The only case that they may call a girl as “slut” is when they are only between men, very close friends talking very honestly… and they are talking about a girl who married a guy because of his money without loving him. For Mexicans, marrying a guy who has money without loving him is plain prostitution.

The same way, if a man “buys” a pretty wife, knowing that she is only interested on his money, girls will not like him anymore. Doing that is like social suicide for him. Because it means that he only sees women as sex dolls, and he can’t love or he has huge flaws that no woman can bear. Girls don’t want that unless they only want money too.

For Mexican men it is not important to have sex before or after marriage, it doesn’t mean that the girl is easy or not. Also they don’t care if the girl was already married or not. In Mexico there is a common saying, something like “If it happened before you 2 met, you shouldn’t feel hurt”. So it doesn’t matter if the girl is virgin or divorced with children, men only care if they are together and happy now.

Actually, couples start having sex very soon because they spend most of their time kissing nonstop since the start of the relationship, they take steps fast.

Actually Mexican men always take steps very fast since they meet you. They will look a girl and if they like her, they will immediately invite her for a date, they ask her to be his girlfriend or even steal a kiss. Men say that they know if the girl will accept the kiss or not just looking at her body language.

An example: The first day of school I had to change classroom, so I joined the class a little later, when the class already started. So I went to the teacher and gave her my documents to do the change. She told me to take a sit and when I looked around, the classroom was full and there were no chairs left. Then a guy touched my shoulder and he was there with a chair he brought from another classroom. Mexican men are that fast.

This means that when I entered the classroom, the guy saw me, he liked me. The thought about what he can do to be different to other guys and get my attention. He realized that there were no chairs left and went to look for one. The put his chair beside him and then he started a whole plan for the world’s dominance.

I think they just like the girls and start taking steps and then they ask themselves if the girl is actually what they want. It is good because they don’t lose opportunities. They like the girl, they get the girl. But it is bad because they may start relationships with a girl that is not what they like and sometimes they end up married to girls that don’t fit with them.

My dad always said: “If a man finds a good girl, he should grab her before somebody else does it. He has to be fast enough to do it while she is in the first stage of love, when she thinks he is perfect. He must marry her soon, before she has time to think if he would be a good husband, because if girls start thinking about it, they will run away”.

Mexican men will propose very soon. Even if the relationship just started, they will start talking about how life could be together. But don’t fall for it! Men around the world are always afraid of marriage, why would Mexican men like to get married? Because they always need a woman to survive.

Mexican men are great boyfriends, but once they get married, everything changes. Mexican men are sooooooo dependent on women. They go from depending on mom to depending on wife. Mexican men don’t know how to cook, to clean, or to take care of them. It is very easy to notice when a man is living alone because he will be a mess.

Men around the world know how to cook, even from Latin America. But Mexican men expect you to do everything at home. They go to work 8 hours every day and after a week they give you all his money and that’s it. Everything else to keep the house running depends on the wife.

They want you to clean, to cook, to pay the bills on time, to take care of children etc. So, men work 8 hours a day while women work 24 hours a day.

At the end, family’s economy depends on how smart the woman is. She is in charge of the family’s savings. For a Mexican man a good woman is the one who keeps good savings on the family’s bank account. If they have a bad wife, she will forget to pay the bills on time, she will spent money on stupid things and get debts. But men won’t ask how she is spending the family’s money until she has to tell them that they family has a huge debt. They don’t want to bother thinking about it. They never say “oh we have to pay the bills today” or “I will buy milk after going to work”. They just don’t think about it. While women must have in mind if she has to pay the bills, buy the food supplies, everything related to children, her own job and lots of things more. That’s why men can’t be multitasking.

Men are used to have mommy doing everything for them. Like this:

Guy: I am so hungry that I have a headache.

Me: Why didn’t you eat?

Guy: Because my mom is not here.

Me: Cook something fast, like an omelet.

Guy. I don’t know how to cook.

Me: You don’t know how to make a sandwich?

Guy: I will wait for my mom.

Me: ¬.¬ Do you prefer to have headache? Eat something.

Guy: I will go to the store and buy some cookies.

Mexican men are so frustrating! Once you get married they just sit at the sofa, playing video games the whole day, with a beer, expecting you to cook for them. So, most women said “No way, I will not marry under those conditions”. Men abused of their women for generations and now women did a real strike. Most women about my age don’t know how to cook or clean the house. If the man wants a maid he has to hire one. Some of us still learned to cook for ourselves, or for the good of children or just because we like it, but not for husbands if they are ungrateful. And now nice husbands have to pay for the mistakes other men did.

Now Mexican men slowly start to think that maybe they will have to learn to cook someday. They help to take care of children, it is a great step. They start to help cleaning the house… but the problem is that Mexican married men feel like kings. They want you to see them like kings.

For Mexican men Money = Power. If they have economic power, they will abuse of that power. So usually the more money they have, the more arrogant they will be. While guys with less money, or guys from the province can be more on the spiritual side and sweeter. Seriously I can’t stand rich guys for even 5 minutes. They just drive me crazy.

Poor guys may do very sweet things. In Mexico is not that common the marriage proposal with a ring, because since the start they talk about getting married. Is not like a sudden proposal with a romantic dinner, champagne and a ring. Only very rich guys do it, because they are more on the style of the United States. They even follow the rule of “a ring must be equal to 3 months of salary”. Middle class guys don’t do it. But there is a very special case:

If you have a boyfriend who is still in the university, who doesn’t have a work yet, and you will get married after graduation, but you know that you will start with a little money… they propose marriage without a diamond ring… they take a little red thread and tie it in your finger instead of a ring and say “I promise that someday I will buy you the ring you deserve”. So they know that they are engaged because of love and not because of money.

When I was younger, for me it was so romantic. But maybe it is not very good for the couple, because people around the girl will know that she will marry a poor guy, “with and uncertain future” and everybody will tell her to think better about her decision, to take things slowly and blah blah. Now I think that the ring is something unnecessary.

In my very own opinion, Mexican men are very good boyfriends and excellent fathers, but bad husbands. They just want to fix everything giving money and buying things but they expect you to solve all the problems magically or to keep everything under control at home.

That’s why age is very important, because a few years may do a huge difference on their attitude towards marriage and relationships.

Now dating a Mexican guy outside of Mexico is very different, because they will adapt to the country they are living. If they know that girls are more open-minded, they will be open-minded, if the girls are traditionalist, they will be traditionalist.

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