Only time will tell if this is really true
Right now, fanpages are a little dead… School year just started, everybody is busy and if we remember that most fans are underage students that must obey their parents… well it is hard to keep the pages as active as a couple of months ago.
Right now, most of the active fans are the older fans, the ones that already finished school. So the conversations have changed a little bit.
Since Heechul posted a picture of an ultrasound showing a baby, there is a weird atmosphere at the fanpage.
First, fans were like “A baby? It must be Sungmin’s baby!!”. And there were 2 extreme reactions. Some of them were really angry and some of them were really happy. And this situation made fans to think about the rest of the members and the fact that they will get married one by one and start having their own children. At the same time Heechul was talking about the “Super Junior’s Juniors” and now fans can’t stop talking about it.
Basically fans don’t want them to get married (obviously), even if they try to avoid any jealousy, it is impossible, they just feel jealous. But if we talk about the members having their own children, they get cheesy and happy and talk about the kind of parents that they would be.
The first ones to get crazy and cheesy about the idea were the ELFish… of course. And I would say “Who wouldn’t like to have Donghae as the father of their children? You see him and you imagine a sweet, lovely father who will live to love his children”. And for me this is a crazy, extremist fangirl sentence that I can’t believe I just said, and I almost smacked myself while saying “Mixie, control yourself please”.
But then I saw fans comments (Why didn’t I screenshot this? So you can see it):
-I have a little nephew and I tell her that Donghae is her uncle. The poor girl is too young and believes everything, she will grow up very confused LOL.
-When I was pregnant I used to play SuJu’s music and sing it to my baby. Now my baby is 2 years old and likes their music. She watches their videos with me.
-When I was pregnant, I used to sit on a rocking chair and talk to my baby about everything. I used to tell my baby that Donghae was her father. I used to caress my belly and said that he was Donghae’s baby.
-Me too!! Actually I call my daughter “Bada” and my husband asks me what does it mean and I just say that it means pretty girl in Korean LOL.
And that kind of comments keep appearing… And I just want to ask: Exactly… what would be the psychological effect on a baby to hear “Donghae is your father” while listening “Still You” the whole day? If the mother is pregnant, and she feels love when saying that, her body will release the “happiness hormones” that will go directly to the baby. Physically it is good, but psychologically… I don’t know…. And can somebody think about the poor real father? Hahaha.
So, fans were talking about their bias being the nicest father, while the rest of the members would be the baby’s “uncles”. So I asked myself, what kind of parents and uncles would they be? Of course we always thing about the good facts, but what would be the bad facts? I will try to be fair-minded but my own ideas would deeply affect my viewpoint.
Basically I have 3 phobias: Heights, insects and babies. That’s why I am doing this. As an exercise to relief the phobia by lowering the stress levels that I can reach while thinking about having a baby. So this is for scientific purposes only.
Let’s start with Donghae. For some reason, people don’t see Donghae for a “one night romance” or an affair… they immediately want to get married and have 30 children with him. We have already seen all those videos and pictures about Donghae being nice and playful to children, so it is easier to imagine the situation, especially if you already have a name for those future children, like “Bada”.
On the good side, Donghae would be a sweet caring father. He would be the kind of father that doesn’t get angry and spends his time playing with his children even if he is tired. I think everyone can imagine Donghae playing with a child or children in an explosion of laughs and happiness. He talks all the time about having children, so I am sure he will be always happy while receiving new of being a father, even if it is not planned, or not from his ideal partner… but he will be happy, and this can make a huge difference. A child will always know what was his father’s reaction and a bad reaction may affect the relationship between father and child.
Donghae is the kind of person that even if he makes mistakes, you know that he is a good person and won’t do it on purpose, maybe on a negligence, but not really wishing to hurt others. Life as Donghae’s child may involve higher good moments and deepest bad moments. Basically the rest will depend on the mother’s intelligence to react to the bad moments. Everything would be fine if his wife is able to have an extra child at home, who will set an example for his children, who has his own car and money.
On the bad side, Donghae may end up being more immature than his own children. And this is the experience talking. You know that my father’s personality is very similar to Donghae’s personality… So I have a very clear image of Donghae doing something crazy and his children thinking “What’s going on with my dad? Why is he so crazy? Other fathers are not like that, my dad is different… luckily”.
I just hope that Donghae’s children heritage his sweetness… that they do all those sweet and tender things that Donghae does… it is too beautiful to be lost.
Even as an uncle, you can imagine Donghae playing with his nephews “the floor is made of lava” and jumping from one sofa to another until they reach the bed and jump over the bed, and he would forget that he is an adult and he would jump until the bed breaks down and then blame the kids to avoid any problem with his sister, who saw everything and is really angry…
Wait feels like a Déjà vu… it is a memory… it was a true story 😄
This topic started because of Heechul.. so let’s talk about Heechul.
I think that one of the most common mistake parents do is to try to look perfect in their children’s eyes. They act like they were never young and never made a mistake and they use that fake image to point at their children with their fingers and judge them. Assuming this attitude makes children and specially teenagers to feel uncomfortable about saying their own problems to their parents. It breaks down the communication.
But Heechul’s children wouldn’t have that problem. I don’t think that Heechul would say to his daughter “But what would think people about us? Aren’t we a respectable family? We are part of the high society of this country… You must behave as a lady! Remember, ladies just sit silently and don’t give an opinion… And take off that red make up, you are not a cheap whore”.
Heechul’s children will feel free to choose their on way to live life. They won’t have the fear/pressure to fulfill his father’s expectations, or to live under the society’s rules. No matter how they are, Heechul will accept and love them. I mean, if he has a gay son or wants to be an artist or a hippie, Heechul won’t judge or say “If you want to be gay you are not my son anymore and get out of my house! I never want to see you again!”. Can you imagine how cool would it be to be a gay son with Heechul as a father? He will approve his children’s decisions, no matter what.
Except if his son wants to be a lawyer or an economist… Just think about Heechul putting his hand on his son’s shoulder, looking deep into his eyes and saying: “But… Son… Are you sure you want to study statistics? Do you really want to do that the rest of your life? There are thousands of ways to earn your own money… You don’t have to do this. I support you, but… Are you sure that you like that?”
I am sure Heechul’s children would feel free to talk about anything to him, without secrets or having double standards. In a friendly environment, there is no need to hide anything. His children may learn a lot about his own experiences in life… If he has time for his descendants… because he may prefer to spend his time playing videogames or hanging out with friends and he may forget that he even has children…
And he would be even cooler as an uncle. He would never let his sister to get very severe to that future teenager. He would be like the aunt you always call when you want something and your parents said no. I can imagine this situation:
Heechul: I am sure that you would look great with that piercing on your belly button. Why is your mom like that? You have no idea about the things your mother did when she was underage LOL
Nephew: Aww thank you so much! Now forge my mom’s signature for the permission, my friends are waiting for me.
Heechul: Wait no. I will go with you. I have to make sure that you are ok, however it is still dangerous and you have no experience doing this. We have to check the place and make sure that you choose the best piercing, and maybe there are nice tattoos too.. so let me grab my furry jacket and… Damn it! I forgot I have a WOW tournament… Here is your permission… now go away… go, go, go… and don’t call me. I will turn off my phone…. Oh Wait.. before you leave, call for a pizza. Thank you, bye!!
Heechul is a free rebel spirit. Let’s say that his sister won’t let her teenage daughter to wear any makeup until she gets a little older. Heechul knows that and as an act of justices, he secretly buys his nephew a set of lipsticks, but not a common set of lipsticks.. it has a silver one, a blue one, a black one and a deep red one.. and says “So you mom didn’t like that lip gloss? Let’s see if she likes black. Mwahahaha”
Wait… it was a memory too… and it was my mom.
Let’s do this in the correct order:
We have the perfect father: Leeteuk. What can he do wrong? He is mature and responsible, but still has a little crazy child in his heart that gets out every time they play Rockstar… (Unless he has a water bottle close, then he turns into a pornstar).
He can be sweet while working over his limits for the good of his family. He already has experience. He was able to do a great job with 14 different personalities. Having his own children must be easier than that.
Sometimes I doubt if he would like to have children or he is already tired of taking care of other people, maybe he wants to relax and have some time without responsibilities. But even if he is a great father, can you imagine how hard would it be to be his son?
Mom: Look, Teukie Jr made this beautiful drawing ^_^
Leeteuk: Uhmmm… At his age I already knew how to draw inside of the lines, and I already knew that the sun isn’t purple.
Or something like this:
Mom: Tests season is over and Teukie Jr. has been studying so hard, he may be tired and stressed, let’s give him some vacations to relax.
Leeteuk: At his age I already was in charge of Super Junior, and nobody gave me “vacations”, he can have vacations when he retires. Tell him to go to work with me after school today.
Mom: But he was studying until late last night, I am sure he didn’t sleep.
Leeteuk: He can sleep on the bus. At his age I already bought my own car.
But hey, wouldn’t it be cool to be Leeteuk’s “nephew”?
Leeteuk: How have you been?
Nephew: Great. I already finished school and I am looking for my first job… I am nervous…
Leeteuk: Let me talk to my friends.. we will find something for you. Don’t expect anything big. You have to start from a lower level and then go up little by little working harder than anyone else… Let me call my friend and see what job we can find for you… ehm… Executive Vice-president at SM would be ok?
Then we have Kangin. When Kangin is surrounded by children he turns into the sweetest man in the world. But Kangin, don’t make the same mistake I did… As the saying goes “A talker falls faster than a lame”. Who knows? Plot twist: He is the first one to get married!!
Kangin… I understand you, believe me, I know that feeling of “Pffftttt… Marriage is not for me” but at the moment you see a child you are like “Awwwwww I want one of these, can I take it to my home and keep it?”. And this is the main problem, how can you have one thing while avoiding the other one?
Because if you have the money, you won’t have the time, if you have the time, you won’t have the money. Anyway you will need help, and a partner can be more problems than help, but at the same time there is always the question… “How do you know that children won’t need both parents?” and everything gets more and more complicated and you just want to visit your friends and say “Can I borrow your child a couple of hours every day? I can feed him, but you have to change the diapers”.
I know that soon or later uncle Kangin will make a baseball team with the Super Junior’s Juniors. Wouldn’t it be great?
Yesung… He is weird on everything… And Yesung likes cameras.. Would Yesung be the kind of parent that likes to record his children’s birth? Can you imagine it? The most stressful moment and Yesung saying:
Yesung: Hey everybody!!! Selfie time!
Doctor: Can’t you do it later?
Yesung: Oh Come on Doctor! Only one selfie please.
Doctor: Ok *Poses*
Yesung: No, I meant, you take me a selfie… I’ll go beside the window to have better light.
Ok, I’ll be serious now. Do you know what would be the best fact about Yesung as father? He will get his child involved on everything he does. And he will teach his son to sing like he taught every SuJu Member. He will take his child to his job, he will teach everything he has learned in life. I am talking about the things that you don’t learn at school. And his child would take advantage of that knowledge. If he teaches his child to be like him, brave, courageous and somebody who can communicate so well, especially when he doesn’t like something… at least, he can be sure that his child won’t be bullied at school.
Yesung is one of the most handsome men I’ve seen in my life… his mom is beautiful, is father is handsome, his brother is handsome… there are good genes, so it is very possible that he would have beautiful descendants… I just hope he doesn’t have a girl… Would you like to be Yesung’s (a.k.a. Rabid Dog) son in law?
Who wouldn’t like to be Yesung’s nephew? Just look at Yesung’s brother. They go everywhere together, they have fun together… Despite his brother is just a teenager, they can have a very fun time…
Yesung is a very romantic man… He is the kind of man that can get any girl he wants, and it is not because of his perfect face, it is because he knows how to make people to fall in love with him…. So he will be the uncle that guys call when they like a girl and don’t know how to get her.
Nephew: Uncle Yesung. I like that girl but I don’t know what to do.
Yesung: Don’t panic. It is not that hard, but if you panic your brain will collapse and you will make mistakes. Just relax and control yourself.
Nephew: But what should I do? What do you do to get a girlfriend? What do you say to get a girl to fall in love with you?
Yesung: Me? Oh, I just say “Hi”.
At the end, Yesung’s child will grow up admiring his father.
But other members just have to be careful, because Yesung can steal your child’s love… just like he did with Donghae. I am sure Leeteuk didn’t notice how Yesung stole his child.
Eunhyuk has lots abilities that I really admire about him, especially because he has the abilities that I don’t have… Eunhyuk has huge amounts of energy with a higher tolerance to frustration. It doesn’t matter what’s going on around him, he is always fine. Eunhyuk has the ability of being always happy, smiling, joking, being positive and he can completely focus on what he is doing. That’s why he is very professional while doing a performance. It doesn’t matter what’s going on his personal life, he always does a great job. Nothing can make him to lose that balance when he is doing a performance. If he can do the same as a father… he would be able to have 30 children and won’t become a grumpy father… Another important fact is that he can express love easily.. He loves to kiss babies.
Or maybe Uncle Eunhyuk would be able to go to the amusement park with the 20 or 30 Super Junior’s Juniors while yelling: “Be free my children!! Open your wings and fly away!! Your parents are not here… Do anything you can’t do at home!!” *Insert a crazy psycho laugh*
Eunhyuk is the kind of person that can survive alone and face any situation and if he teaches the same to his child and teaches to be brave and fearless and encourages him to create his own pathway, his child would make great things, on his own way.
I am sure that Eunhyuk won’t have a dull son…. And his son will be ready to face bullying at school, because Eunhyuk will bully his own son even before the child goes to school. It is very possible that Eunhyuk’s son will bully the rest of the Super Junior’s juniors…
Now let’s talk about Siwon. To grow up emotionally and psychologically healthy, children basically need 2 things: Love (that involves attention) and stability. A child needs a stable, safe environment to freely develop his personality without worrying about anything else. And this is Siwon’s strength. I can almost swear that Siwon won’t get divorced. His children won’t be worried about money. He is a decent man who will look for a decent mother or his children and none of them will do crazy things. He will follow his parent’s steps. He has had a good guide and he will use that good guide to his children. His children will grow up the same way he did… What problem can they face? What would worry those kids?
I will tell you a little secret… Once I had a boyfriend (The good boyfriend) who was a mix of Leeteuk and Siwon… He was a very, very, very religious man. He seriously believed everything, at least when I met him. Since the first day, even before he was my boyfriend, he used to say that he was really worried about being a father. He said that there is a “curse” for religious people, that says: “Every 4th generation, a child will lose his way and will leave the religion, having a life or damnation and his parents will suffer due to that”. And he always said: “I am the 3rd generation, this means that my children won’t live under the rules of God. It deeply hurts me”.
And for some reason, every time people talks about Siwon’s faith, that memory comes to my mind.
Do you remember Heechuls nephew wanting a piercing but parents said no and Heechul would help the girl to get the piecing? Just think that the girl is Siwon’s daughter….
Siwon may be a very good parent, because he learned about a good parenthood at his home. The only fact that he should be careful is about breaking up bad cycles and habits. If he is smart, and he is, he can take the good facts about his parents and change the bad facts.
And I know he will do it, because he is aware of that. Once I saw an interview where Siwon was talking about his parents being too strict to him and he said: “They told me not to have a girlfriend, but I wanted one. I managed to secretly have a girlfriend. They were so strict that I just disobeyed them. Now I see that they were only thinking about the best for me, it was just the way they did it and how I reacted.”
Here we can see that he understood very well the situation and knows exactly where his parents made a mistake… therefore when he faces the same situation, he will do a little change and get a better result.
I think Siwon would be a great father/uncle of a boy… but not of a girl. Who will want to have a father in law who is a martial arts master?
Siwon’s daughter: My dad won’t let me to go to the party… everybody will go. He only lets me to go to church. He wants me to dress like Kyuhyun’s daughter…. Yesterday I told him “Why should I dress like that? Dad I am not a nun” And he sent me to my room. I wish my dad was as cool as your dad…
Heechul’s Daughter: Is he that strict? Wow… Yeah my dad allows me to do anything I want… Sometimes he even goes with me to the concerts. It is funnier to go with him than with friends.
Siwon’s Daughter: Awww… Can we talk with him? I will tell uncle Heechul to talk to my father and tell him to be more relaxed…
Heechul’s Daughter: We can’t. He went to South America 4 months ago to try out something called “ayahuasca” and we lost track of him… I am starting to feel worried, he never gets lost more than 3 months… I wish my dad was as serene as yours.
Ryeowook would be a great father. There is no doubt about it. He will be a “penguin father” (and I said those were extinct haha). I think that one of the biggest fears a mother can have is “What would happen to my children if I die? If something bad happens to me, who would take care of them?” Because usually we, women, see men as… “Unable to take care of a child by themselves, without the help of a woman”. I think Wook can do it. He knows how to take care of a child by himself even if the mother is not there… and he will do it even if the mother is there. He will want things to get done the way he wants and will do a great job as father… and soon or later he will leave out the mother of the child.
Ryeowook: No, No, you are not cutting his beef correctly… I will show you how to do it… oh forget it… I’ll do it by myself… Wait… What’s that?
Mother: The dessert, Chocolate cake.
Ryeowook: Ok, but only for today… Next time it would be better to have something healthier… I have to go back to work now…
Mother: Ok, I will take the children to the park.
Ryeowook: Remember to bring a lunch.
Ryeowook: No, no… bring some granola bars or something like that.
Ryeowook will take care of everybody’s children… and parents…
SuJu Member: Son, say good bye to your uncle.
Child: Good bye uncle Ryeowook!!
Ryeowook: It is a cold night… Where is your jacket?
SuJuMember: Oh I forgot it…
Ryeowook: How irresponsible! That’s why I have some children’s clothes in my closet. Come child, we will find a jacket for you. You shouldn’t go out without a jacket. You may get flu.
SuJuMember: It’s ok. We just have to get in the car and…
Ryeowook: No, no. You will need a jacket, and maybe some gloves.
Child: Dad, why is he putting me 3 jackets?
Ryeowook: I told you it’s cold outside. There should be a scarf…
SuJuMember: Come one Wook! Its early June… there is not snow outside… We just have to walk a few steps to the car… ahh I want to go home… How long will it take?
Ryeowook: We are done… here child, have a granola bar and a bottle of vitamins…
Kyuhyun would be the kind of father who is really interested on his child’s whole life, he wouldn’t be like the parents that think that they should only give a weekly amount of money and they are done as parents.
I can imagine Kyuhyun doing homework, sitting beside his child, doing homework until night and explaining everything sweetly while caressing the child’s head and teaching the little child how to be as arrogant and haughty as he is…
Just imagine Kyuhyun watching the spring’s festival while children dance and sing wearing bee’s and flower’s costumes and he is just sitting there, with a huge smile showing how proud he is of his child while thinking:
“This is the most ridiculous celebration, why is everything so stupid? Somebody kill me please. How long will it take? I can feel my brain cells drying… I want to throw up, I don’t know if it is because of the stupid song or the hangover… however… GodKyu stick to the plan: Keep smiling, some applauses, greet the teacher from far away and run to the car before you throw up.”
You may not want Kyuhyun as your child’s uncle….
Child: Hi uncle Kyu!!!
Kyuhyun: Hey boy!! How have you been? I missed you so much and I wanted to visit… 8×9??
Child: Huh? Look, I can write my own name!!
Kyuhyun: Tell me every province and its capital.
Child: Huh? A what?
Kyuhyun: *Hugging the child’s father* Sorry man, your child is stupid.